What We Have and What We Need
by MollyFlenderson
Summary: After Drake's death, Josh must live, and heal with his young neice. Oneshot, possibly longer if I get more ideas :


Early one morning, a figure stepped off the sidewalk, her sneakers squeaking against the wet concrete.

This figure was just a child, barely twelve and a half.

_Hey! I'm not a child!_ She thought. But, deep down in that little corner of her heart that she was scared to explore, she _needed_ someone. In fact, she _had_ someone…once. But now, that person was gone.

_Am I supposed to grow up now? Who do I have?_

She neared the bus stop, to find a few girls there, talking. They were popular, so she didn't have much to do with them.

_Popularity. _She sighed.

_That is one thing Daddy couldn't give me. _

A girl with a pink sweater and crimson hair saw her and gave a small smile. "Hi, Tawny," she said with a sympathetic look. She managed to mumble hello back.

_Stuck-up morons. They don't know what sympathy is!_

The blonde girl she was talking to gave her a look of disgust. "Tawny Parker? What a freak!" she whispered to the pink-sweatered girl. Tawny looked away, embarrassed.

_What is wrong with me? _

The tears finally fell.

The redhead shot her friend a look. "Hey, go easy on Tawny… Her dad just died."

---

Josh Nichols walked into his cubicle, tossing his jacket on the chair. His watch read 9:30.

_Damn, I am so fired. _

Josh sat down at the desk and clicked on the computer.

_It's just another day, Josh. Don't lose it._

He opened a folder and took out some work, trying to put the week's tragedy in the back of his mind.

_Yeah, fat chance. _

Ever since Drake died, he had felt a range of emotions, starting with sadness and disbelief and ending with anger. He was angry at Drake's ex-wife. April was a junkie, and drugs kept her from being with Tawny. Josh was the only one to console her at his funeral. Josh was simply the only one besides Drake, and that wasn't fair at all.

_Funeral. _

Josh sighed and ran his hand through his thick black hair.

_I can't believe he's gone. _

A pretty woman with short brown hair approached Josh, who broke quickly from his thoughts. She gave him a warm smile and handed him some paperwork. "Good morning, Josh."

"Hi, ah, sorry I'm late, Ms. Hayes. Something came up and…"

The woman giggled. "Hey, don't worry about it. It happens to the best of us. And how many times have I told you call me Clarice?"

"Oh, sorry." He blushed and looked away.

_What is wrong with me?_

Suddenly, Josh's boss, Mr. Davis, approached them and cleared his throat. "Mr. Nichols, I checked the database, and it's alright if you take today off."

"Oh, I…can't…"

"Sure you can, Josh," Clarice said. "I can finish your paperwork. Go ahead." She smiled, and he smiled back.

"Alright, thanks." Josh got his coat with a smile and left the office.

"That was a nice thing you did, Mr. Davis." Clarice said.

He sighed. "Yeah, well, I should go easy on him. After all…his brother just died.

---

Tawny was in her room, packing clothes in a grey suitcase. Between folding sweaters, she reminisced about when her parents were together, maybe even happy. Picnics in the park, Daddy's concerts, Super Bowl parties with Josh, there were many…

_But I wish there were more. _

Tawny's dresser was emptied, but there was one last thing to get. She walked over to her desk drawer and it out gently. It was a photograph in a crystal frame.

The picture was taken at Tawny's 12th birthday. She remembered it quite well. There were gifts and a cake, and a couple of her friends showed up too. Josh came too, he got her a mountain bike.

_That was the best gift._

Tawny was near delirium the first time she rode it. Two months later, she crashed it into a tree and broke her ankle. After that, Drake always joked that she learned coordination from Josh.

She looked down at the photograph once more. It was definitely a fun party, but ever since then… something about it bothered her…

_Mom never showed up. _

The frame was about as old as she was. It was nice looking at one time, but now it was just dirty and cracked.

_A broken frame. How symbolic. _

Tawny took the picture out and slipped it into her pocket. She pulled the handle on her suitcase and wheeled it down the hall, where a social worker was waiting. He smiled.

"Are you ready to go?"

_I have no choice._

"There's been a change in plans. You won't be living with your mother," he said as they got into his black Jeep. Tawny was confused.

"Where will I go then?" She was slightly relieved.

"You will be staying with your uncle. We couldn't find your mom. Is that okay?"

She sighed. "Yeah, it's okay. Heck, I couldn't find her for the past twelve years."

---

_You gave up your last responsibility;Drake's last gift.How could you do that to her? To him?_

Josh looked at his niece across the dinner table. She was wearing a brown wool sweater and looking down sadly at her food, praying she would not cry.

_How could you do that to her?_

"Are you hungry, Tawny?"

She looked at him, her brown eyes misty. "No, I'm not. I'm Sorry…"

"There's nothing to be sorry about." He took a breath. "Do you want to…talk about anything?"

Tawny bit her bottom lip. "No thanks. I just want to go to bed now."

"That's alright." She got up from the table and left.

_Fantastic, she hates me now. _

_---_

Hours later, Tawny awoke to her uncle's voice. She got out of bed and tip toed to the door. He obviously sounded very angry.

_Great, he hates me now. _

Tawny sat and rested her head on the door.

And listened.

---

Josh was shaken out of a deep sleep by the sound of a ringing telephone. His clock read midnight. He groaned drowsily.

_Ugh, I've told Drake a million times not to –_

He snapped out when he remembered where he was. He sighed and answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Josh." He recognized the voice immediately.

"What do you want, April?"

"I want to say…thank you."

Josh was disgusted. "Thank you? What the hell are you talking about?"

"I need to go out of state for a few months. To…get better…"

Josh exploded. "Yeah, just like you were going to 'get better' years ago!"

"Why are you acting like this?"

He calmed down a little. "Because…I had to grow up without a mother, also, and it was horrible. But you wouldn't care, because you the only person you care about it yourself!"

She was taken aback. "That's…not true..."

"No, no. It is true because you weren't there for Tawny. Not for her birthday, you didn't even show up for Drake's funeral! Can't you see how much you broke her heart?"

"Josh…"

"Let me ask you something, April. Did you ever want Tawny? At all?"

There was a moment of silence. "No, I never wanted her."

"Well, that's _your_ loss." And he hung up, fuming. Tawny entered the room, startling him.

_He cares. Just like Dad. _

"Josh, what's wrong with me?" she asked, sobbing. "Why doesn't Mom want me?" Josh walked over and held Tawny.

"Tawny, listen to me…" he said. "There is _nothing_ wrong with you. _Nothing, _I promise."

Tawny motioned to the phone. "Then, why…" Josh kneeled to be eye to eye with her

"Your mother has a lot of problems…" his eyes clouded up. He was trying to be strong for Tawny, but…

_There is no point to be strong anymore._ _Drake is gone…_

"I miss him. He was my dad, and now he's gone and I don't know what to do anymore." Another tear rolled down her cheek.

"I miss him, too… He loved you so much. You were his … little girl."

Tawny smiled a little. "Hey, I still am."

"Yeah, you are," Josh said. "I'd bet anything he's soproud of you right now."

Tawny looked down. "I wish he was here, though."

"You know, your dad was my …best friend."

_Why am I complaining? I just lost my brother. She lost a dad. And a mom. Do I have the right she does?_

"It's hard to go on after you lose someone, Tawny. I know that from experience."

Tawny nodded. "Maybe it would be a little easier if we helped each other out, you know. Maybe we can learn the answers to the questions we're asking ...ourselves."

Josh smiled a little. "I'm always going to be here for you, Tawny."

She was silent for a moment. "…I guess what we have and what we need are the same things in the end, aren't they, Josh?"

Josh looked at her and nodded. "That's right."

_What a special little girl. _

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

Tawny sighed and sat on the bed. "Well, Daddy didn't tell me much about when _he _was growing up, do you have any stories from that?"

_Do I?_

He wasn't a teenager anymore, but then why were the memories so clear? Josh stared down at his niece's curious, brown eyes and grinned.

_Way to go, Drake._

"Yeah," he said, nodding. "I can tell you a couple."

Tawny grinned back. "I'm listening."

**End. **


End file.
